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1. I am excited for this project because it allows me to do something that I love doing while also receiving credit for it. The final product of this project will not be the final product of my overall endeavor, however. The completion of this project is essentially me getting out my entire story on paper with moderate editing. I will have something to revise as many times as I want in order to make it read as beautifully as I want it to, and will then have something truly worthy to give to a publisher. Since I am combining the writing process with identifying and elaborating on psychological concepts, I will have a greater chance to get to know my characters on an even more personal level. I believe this will help to make my characters not only richer in my mind, but also richer on paper.

2. I feel I have put a lot on my plate. Although I know I can accomplish the task, it is still a tad daunting, especially while being a full time student and mother. I often experience writer’s block, and it can sometimes take weeks before I’m over it. During this project, I know I will encounter the dreaded WB more times than I care to think about. Because I can’t wait out my WB during this project, forcing myself through periods like this will be difficult, and will more than likely have me putting things down on paper that don’t sound the way I want them to. I am mostly worried that my book will sound like a child wrote it. This kills me in a figurative sense because I know the kind of work I am capable of.

3. Upon completion of this project, I want to be able to hold the manuscript in my hands, take a deep breath, and experience a sense of relief. Relief in the fact that I accomplished something that I thought would take years. I may not have my finished draft ready for submission to a publisher, but I will have the most difficult part of this dream of having a published novel finished. My project’s story will tell that I went above and beyond the bare minimum and decided to do something not just for a grade, but something that is truly for me and my number one dream.

4. I think my biggest area of growth will have to do with my work ethic. As of now I am a serious procrastinator, and time management is definitely not one of my strengths. In order to complete this project in the time I have allotted myself, I will not be able to lounge about at a leisurely pace. Instead, I will have to create mini-deadlines and stay organized. For someone like me, time management is something I will have to force myself into. It will be uncomfortable, and there will be times when I just don’t feel like it. Over the months, I hope I will gradually get into the habit of maintaining a good pace without feeling like I’m having to constantly police myself.

5. If my project fails, it will absolutely be because I didn’t buckle down and just do it. I know there is a ton of work involved in what I have chosen to do, but I am also realistic. I wouldn’t have given myself such a workload if I didn’t know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was more than capable of succeeding. As I mentioned previously, I will have to make mini-deadlines and stay on top of them. More than likely, I will even end up policing myself. But…I know I can do this project. If it fails, the responsibility for that failure will fall solely on my shoulders.

6. When you get writer’s block, just push through, even if your writing during those times sounds like garbage. I know it’s painful to write through all the imperfections, but it is essential that you do it. You do not have the time to sit around and wait for your writer’s block to decide to take a vacation. Also, you are writing the first draft of this book for your EDGE project, not for a publisher. As long as you do your best and the words come out, you can spend that last month editing and revising before you turn in the manuscript. The people in the EDGE department are not Tor publishing for crying out loud. You love writing. It is your passion. This should be fun, so treat it as such and you will have a good time.

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       October 2016

            

            I started my chapter summaries this month. Although I had some ideas earlier in the year,             getting them out on paper is harder than I thought. Hopefully it won't be too difficult to                   keep the plot progressing in a direction that makes use of the various elements of diverse                 cultures and history within my story. 

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       December 2016

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            My chapter summaries are coming along, although the plot for each feels a bit rushed. The             history of the story as well as the dynamics of the characters need more thought. I feel plot             holes coming along. But at the pace I'm going with these summaries, they are inevitable. I               can mend such holes much, much later. This month, I also did a bit of research on Carl                   Jung's theory of personality, as well as the Big Five personality traits and the                                       corresponding NEO-PI-R assessment in order to get a better idea of who my characters are,             and what drives and motivates them. 

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       January 2017

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            This month, I finished my first three chapters. In chapter 1, I alluded to a coming storm.                 However, in the span of 3 chapters, seemed to have forgotten to go back to it altogether. I'll             have to fix this error in future drafts.

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       February 2017

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            I'm having trouble writing the magic scene. I know exactly how it looks in my mind, but it               might be confusing for many to read. I think the descriptions of magic will either have to                 be explained further at the beginning, or understood more in depth later through                             continued reading and understanding of how magic works and exactly what it is. 

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       March 2017

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            Writer's block hit bad this month. Although it never really passed, and it killed me to                       continue on with work I believed to be much less than what I wanted, the show must go                   on. Chapter 4 is finally done. 

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       April 2017

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            I wrote chapter 5 this month, and introduced a character who has a beginning that starts               far before this book. When I write the prologue, I hope any confusion in this chapter is                     cleared up a little. I spent about half an hour researching names for this character as well,             and finally decided on Arden. In Celtic, it's meaning is "high" or "high land." I chose this                   name because symbolically, its meaning coincides with his military rank as a character,                 and importance within the story. 

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       June 2017

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            I started chapter 6 this month. I spent a particularly long amount of time trying to imagine             how Darvarna Forest would work. I drew inspiration from both Terry Goodkind's Sword of             Truth series, as well as an episode from the SciFi BBC television series, Merlin. Gookind's                 description of the section of the forest within the magic wall is surreal and almost other-                 worldly. Morgana's magic tower seems almost demonic in nature as it plays games with                   Gwen's mind. I wanted to combine these elements and add other ideas of my own to create             an incredibly dark and treacherous place. 

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       August 2017

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            As I was writing the rising action for this chapter, I wanted to create a scene that seemed                 confusing, but in a way that made sense. The part where Nemamiah witnesses the robin's               egg he's holding start to bleed seems awkward to read. This is mostly because the beams of             light he's seeing are described as having the coloring of a robin's egg, and then they                           magically become one. I need to rethink this part of the chapter. I had planned for                             Nemamiah to have reached Ifreann prison by the end of chapter 6, but found that I liked                 the ending with Arden using his magic to knock everyone out better suited for what was                 going on. I also finished the prologue this month and introduced Nem's father and                           Christian. This section starts purposefully abruptly and gives minimal background of                      "current" events.

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            Writing this book has been a long and arduous, but incredibly satisfying journey. The main             struggle I faced was the ever-present and most unwelcome writer's block. Often, I would sit             starting at a computer screen for minutes at a time, pouring over the last couple                               paragraphs I had just written, while trying to figure out where I wanted my story to go                     next. It was a frustrating and even helpless feeling when I would spend so much of my                     time trying to work on my book, but got nowhere fast. Although I didn't record the                           time I was plagued with writer's block, I think it's safe to say I spent at least a good 15 hours             entertaining it. 

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            Using psychology to assist me in character development helped me immensely. I wouldn't               think that any readers would be able to see a significant amount, if any, psychology going               on in my writing, but that's okay. Although I would eventually like the discipline to show                 through my writing in an obvious yet subtle way, researching certain personality theories               and concepts was mostly for my benefit alone this go around. I've gained a better                               understanding of who my characters are and what motivates them, while also learning                   their quirks, their mannerisms, and the general but detailed ways in which they are                         unique.

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            I feel I have a strong start on a project I wish to continue for both personal and                                 professional reasons. I always knew I wanted to write a book, but I didn't know where to                 start. While chapter summaries helped with the writing process, I rarely stuck to them.                   In fact, I deviated from them 100% of the time, finding that my original plans didn't quite                 jive with my characters and where they wanted to go. Besides writer's block, the hardest                 part of this project was time management, as well as recording time. Time management                   speaks for itself in that I wasn't the best at managing my time, and often found myself past             the edge of my personal deadlines. Recording time was difficult because I only wanted to                 record active time writing and researching. Because of this, I often found myself pausing to             record the end of a writing period when I was actually trying to think of what to write next.

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            All in all, I feel good about my accomplishments with this book thus far. As the story is                   only six chapters in, I plan on continuing the story until it's end...at least until I feel it                       appropriate to break for a second novel in order to move the plot and characters along on               a different level. I'm happy with how far my characters have come and with who they are               becoming. I've noticed that with other series of books I've read, the earlier books always                   seem weaker than the newer ones. I strongly believe this has great deal to do with                             character development. The longer a writer knows their characters, the more believable,                 predictable, and personable they become to both the writer and audience. 

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